How Soon Can You Be Intimate After Giving Birth?

During pregnancy, your body receives no shortage of attention … in the form of doctor exams and medical tests. After you give birth, your body receives a whole different type of attention, this time from your little bundle of joy. With a lot of your time being divided between playtime and post-pregnancy checkups, you may find yourself longing for some intimate “mommy and daddy” time.

Though most doctors say to wait until your four- to six-week postpartum check-up, there really is no timetable set in stone for having sex after giving birth. As long as you have your doctor’s go-ahead, and your physical, mental, and emotional health is on track – you can ease back into intimacy. When determining your personal timeline for postpartum intimacy, there are several important factors to consider. Keep reading to learn more about these factors and gain valuable insights to help you navigate your personal timeline for intimacy after giving birth.

The Technical Timetable for Sex After Giving Birth

Just because having a baby is a common experience doesn't mean that it affects your body in a common way. Even if you're healthy and you have an easy birth, you still need time to heal. Most experts advise you to wait until you’re four- to six-weeks postpartum, with six weeks being more common. If you had to have stitches from an episiotomy or surgery, you may even need to wait a little longer. Make sure you’re open with your doctor, as he or she can help tell you when intimacy is right for you and your body. It’s always better to wait until you are completely healed and ready, rather than risk possible infection, injury and pain.

The Physical Timetable for Postpartum Intimacy

Some women feel comfortable with intimacy after four- to six-weeks, but that doesn't mean your individual body will be ready – or not ready, for that matter. On the other hand, at eight weeks you might still find you're still too tired or too sore. The key is to listen to your body and don’t rush into anything until you feel physically ready.

If you are ready to rekindle the sparks but are experiencing vaginal dryness or light pain even after you've healed, a personal lubricant, such as K-Y^® Jelly, maybe all the help you need to feel comfortable. Women who breastfeed are more prone to vaginal dryness, but pregnancy hormones make dryness pretty common.

The Emotional Timetable for Sex After Giving Birth

How you feel emotionally is just as important as how you feel physically. Luckily, there's no rule about when you should feel emotionally ready. Some women worry about getting pregnant again too soon or find they're self-conscious about their post-pregnancy bodies. Some couples are so tired out from being new parents that they're both happy to spend their free time sleeping or cuddling.

 A new baby changes everything from your sleeping and eating schedule to the relationship you have with your partner, and that’s going to take some time to get used to. Talk with your partner about when is best for both of you. Chances are, where it concerns your new family and your relationship, he is on the same page as you are.

Other Forms of Postpartum Intimacy

If you're not sure you're ready to be physically intimate or you're just not in the mood, try initiating other intimate activities, such as cuddling, kissing or just sharing close physical contact. These intimate gestures can provide a sense of fulfillment and closeness, addressing your need for intimacy while adjusting to the changes in your body and emotions during the postpartum period.

Sometimes, a tender caress or a loving embrace can create a profound sense of connection, fostering emotional intimacy with your partner and nurturing the bond between you. Remember, postpartum intimacy encompasses a wide spectrum of experiences beyond sexual intercourse, allowing you to prioritize your well-being and explore different paths to connect with your partner on a deeper level.

The Truth About Sex After Birth and Postpartum Intimacy

Bringing a new life into the world is a transformative experience, and as a new parent, you deserve to understand the physical, technical, and emotional aspects of resuming intimacy after giving birth. While there is no fixed timetable, it's crucial to prioritize your well-being and receive medical clearance before embarking on this journey.

When it comes to having sex after birth, there are several crucial factors to consider, including medical, physical, and emotional timetables. Understanding these aspects is essential for navigating the journey of postpartum intimacy and recovery. By acknowledging the unique healing process of your body, obtaining medical clearance, and addressing emotional readiness, you can approach the resumption of intimacy with confidence.

Exploring other forms of postpartum intimacy is also a valid option. If physical intimacy feels too soon or you're simply not in the mood, engaging in activities like cuddling, kissing, or close physical contact can foster a deep sense of connection with your partner. These intimate gestures satisfy the need for intimacy, allowing you to strengthen your bond while adjusting to the changes in your body and the demands of parenthood.

Remember, your journey is unique, and there is no one-size-fits-all approach to sex after giving birth. Prioritize open communication, listen to your body, and take the time you need to heal and reconnect with your partner on your terms. Whether it's physical, technical, or emotional, understanding the timetable and exploring alternative forms of intimacy will help you navigate this transformative chapter of your life.

References

• Mayo Clinic: Sex After Birth: Set Your Own Timeline  
• BabyCenter: Let's Talk About Sex: After the Baby
• What to Expect: 6 Common Sex-After-Pregnancy Problems and Solutions 
• BabyCenter: Sex After Birth  

About the Author

Teresa is a Planned Parenthood-certified responsible sexuality educator. Over the past decade, she has worked in her community as a sexuality and healthy relationships educator, pregnancy options counselor and domestic violence victim advocate.

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